Shut Up! Take Your Compliment And Shove it!

An hour ago, I was at a convenience store getting couple of items, while I was inside, my phone rang and I started speaking in Creole with a friend I haven't heard in a while. As I was speaking, this man who was standing behind the counter was staring at me. As I was speaking on the phone, he was trying to get my attention by asking me SLOWLY "Miss, h.o.w. d.o.  y.o.u. s.a.y.  I.  l.o.v.e.  y.o.u.", of course I ignored him, since I was still on the phone. He asked again. "Why do you want to know", I asked. "Well, I wanted to tell you I love you". He proceeded to say "Buh, Miss! How come you smart! You coulda fool me", 
 "Excuse me, what do you mean?"
"Well, in farty years (he means forty), first time I meet a smat (smart) hation (Haitian)"
"Go s...", I wanted to tell him to go suck a nut, but I retain myself.
 "Maybe you should get out more, get off island a little bit. See the world before making your conclusions. As far as I know, Haitians are some of the most intelligent people on this earth. Because some just arrive here and don't speak your language yet, doesn't mean Haitians are stupid."
"Well, miss, I been arong de worl (around the world), I was in de aaamy (army), I been to Santo Domingo..."
"Santo Domingo is not Haiti. Anyway..." and I went about my business. The store owner told me "tell him again. Ignorant people like him need to know". But I didn't think it was necessary to continue because I was losing my cool.

These kind of comments are so common on St Thomas and the thing is, they expect you, the Haitian to say "Thank you". No. you're being disrespectful with your backhanded compliments! When will people realize that these kind of comments are not OK? Just because you make that one exception doesn't mean I will agree with you that all other Haitians, except me, are stupid! this is pure ignorance! I do regret not telling him something REALLY bad but at the same time, I am proud of myself for having self-control.

I should be used to these comments by now, I have been getting them since I moved here over four years ago. When I started dating the person I am still with right now, some family members had an issue with the fact that I was Haitian. When they learn to know me, one of them still had issues with Haitians "except me". She would introduce me to people and add "She is Haitian BUT she is smart. Yeah, very smart girl" but then she would ask me things like "How come ahyou Haitians so dark, mehson!" Or "Why dem people so stchupid! They can't even fill out a western union form and their names so hard to say and dey so retarted dey wouldn't wait for it. Then, I have to be calling stchupid names..." Right in my face. Me, the Haitian.

Then, there was the suspicion that I was with him for a green card! When they learned I had a green card before I even moved here, his cousin boldly asked me to show it to him Of course I asked him to get the *** out of my face, but how disrespectful is that?! And these are black, island people who are always ready to cry RACISM for any little thing or even a look from a white person.


I won't even go over everything I have heard from co-workers and other random ignorant people on the streets of St. Thomas. That same "in-law" person once said "there are no light-skinned Haitians". One day I was watching videos of T-Vice, CaRiMi, she swore I was lying about them being Haitians... One co-worker once told me "you're the first pretty Haitian I've met. I thought all Haitians were ugly". I again told him to get out more because "I'm far from being the prettiest Haitian out there" (really)! When my reaction was the total opposite of what he expected, he was puzzled. Seriously, when you have those kind of retarded, ignorant comments, keep them to yourself. Any Haitian in his/her right mind will NOT say thank you to your "compliment".

So far the worst behaviors and comments I have gotten have been from Black, Caribbean people. I have worked with people who automatically assumed I didn't know anything, that I was stupid etc... Coworkers got very hostile toward me because I'm Haitian and I  was getting higher salary then them. Some said it in my face, especially at that clinic where I was employed for almost a year in the administrative department. I had to work extra hard to prove myself. I was attacked, I was promised "a good beating" by immature pricks, all for no reason! I was only guilty of being Haitian and getting a higher salary, which I deserved!

Needless to say that Haitians who can't speak English and defend themselves like I can go through hell everyday at work. People who look like them but just happen to be more fortunate and speak another language put them through hell and do them some injustice.

I am so tired of this crap!  The same way you feel when you think you are a victim of racism, is the same way I feel when you discriminate against Haitians. You all need to stop it and stop it now! It's not pretty to be ignorant!

Couldn't Wait to Go!

Where do I start? My life has been quite interesting for the past 4 weeks. From being bullied by toxic employees to being laid off once again because of "economic reasons". Let me start with the bullies first. I worked for 8 months for that small company, to which I was dedicated. They would ask me to go get office supplies, go to multiple offices downtown on a busy day, while there are 3 cruise ships at the doc, which means crazy traffic; and I had a pretty good professional relationship with my immediate boss. We worked together before for a previous company, and he re-hired me when the opportunity was available. And I am grateful for that. But have I been an airhead, I doubt that he would have hired me again.

Anyway... I worked with some interesting characters. There is an unimaginable amount of daily drama for such a tiny workplace. I stayed away from the drama for almost the entire time I was employed there. Although words always came back to me about who is saying what about me, I tried my best and ignored it all; that is until I was attacked by a bully for no reason.

I always wonder what makes people so obnoxious and hateful towards others who never bothered them in the first place. First, this person started to demand that I get write up for things I never did. When that didn't get the reaction she expected, she attacked me and it went like this: "I hate when you're giving this look like you are something. You're nobody..." she then slammed the door saying "This bitch thinks she is better than everybody else". He r big problem was that I was never in their circle telling them who I slept with, what I ate, where I went... That made me "stalk up". I had enough. The name calling was uncalled for. So, I went to TRY talking to her. but as the loud-mouth, bully that she is, she started to yell on top of her lungs! No professionalism. Majority of these people act just like they do when they are at home; and it was just disgusting. The only thing that I said that caught her attention was "You don't know me like that. Don't mess with me". Once more, she started yelling like a little kid "YOU'RE THREATENING ME! I AM GOING TO THE POLICE". When I realized I was just wasting my time trying to reason someone who had no common sense to begin with, I gave up. I thought we were done. But I was wrong.

Days later, I once again complained to her manager about her behavior, because she accused me of putting her picture on Facebook. Her proof? Her pet who I added on Facebook, which I ALWAYS knew was a mistake but was trying to be nice and kept her, showed her a picture of someone's disgustingly scary feet that I added to my page and decided that they were her feet. I removed the troll from my page but the fact that they could not prove that the picture was her, really pissed them off and I would not break down and cry and apologize to her so she could be my friend. I mean, really? I am not attention-deprived, I didn't come to work to make friends, I have been burnt before and I refused to repeat the same mistake. I was friendly with everyone. I always said "good morning, good afternoon..." But it wasn't enough to some.

Her manager called us into a "meeting". When she walked through the door, she said "Did you call me for "THIS"" pointing at me. She then proceeded to talk about "the picture" and said "You little trash. You're trash. From a poor country. I can't do my feet because i send money that I make to your poor country". I could not hold my laugh. Putting all bad hygiene on Haiti. I told her that she is stupid, which was the only name I called her and it wasn't a lie. I know I should not have stooped to her level but for a moment I had to say something. Although she "apologized" for misunderstanding "my looks" but she promised me that "she will deal with me and by the time she was done with me, I would regret it". She said "you think you're all that. You think you're cute, but you don't impress me , you little Haitian trash...." Her real problem was that I'm a Haitian with an office position and not under her, cleaning. The common thing on St. Thomas is that all Haitians are dumb, have no skills and dress funny. If you can wear something nice and can say two words in English, ALMOST everyone boldly tells you "You don't look Haitian". I have no problem with cleaning, because I clean my house regularly, but she could not be at peace with the thought that she would never be my manager. Not in this life.

When the "big manager" came, the one to whom I have been very loyal, he called us into a "meeting". Instead of addressing the behavior of the bully, he suggested that we both resign, should he ever have to mediate anything between us again. Let me be clear. This is the manager who hired me twice, who basically knows what I would and would not do at the job and this the same manager who basically knows that this person is a bully because I am not the first to be in an altercation with her. I might have been the only one who dared standing up to her. I was not asking for anyone to be fired. But suggesting that I quit because I am being harassed by another manager was an eye-opener.

After the "meeting", she went to her "pet" saying "Fu** all Haitians." She then turned and saw me by the cooler, and said "Fu** Haitians. I will make her suffer. I will make her suffer real bad". I had to go and get a police report and was ready to go further with it. On this small island, every threat is ought to be taken seriously because most of the time, they become reality. Although I was being bullied AT THE JOB, the manager suggested that whatever will go down, just don't involve the property. Otherwise, do whatever. I realized that day that I was so wrong for being so loyal to that boss. I was so wrong for being so dedicated. Always ready to stay overtime even if i had plans, always ready to pick him up if he has car trouble, always ready to use my own gas to do the company's business... Yet all he cared about was that the property he was managing. Not the welfare of the employee(s).

The next day, I asked him again "if i am being harassed by that employee, what do i do? Since I can't come to you unless I bring my resignation letter?" he once again said "the two of you need to work it out or else maybe you should find something else..." Which wasn't needed because everyone knew I was going to be laid off since 3-4 months ago. Someone cared to tell them. Someone with the power to hire and fire but never bothered to tell me. But I knew. Things are not so secret at that "secret place". Although he didn't confirm it to me, I was emotionally prepared for the news.

On June 30th, it happened. At 4:30 or so, he went to the meeting room and called me and the other manager and gave me the news. "Your position is being eliminated because of economic reasons. After doing a thorough business review, we decide to restructure and regretfully it affects your position. So today was your last day. You will be compensated blablabla" All I said was "Ok. Thank you." And I left to gather my things, which were not much. I never have much in any desk or office I've had so far... I was sad that I left that toxic place. I was surprisingly calm and even relieved. It wasn't a shock, but I was disappointed to see that he surprised me like this. He could have warned me weeks ago. You know, something like "You know things are not good right now. So, don't be shocked if you get this news soon..." Not that he had to but...

I am still debating with myself: Should I send a "Thank you" email to him anyway for the opportunity? I definitely learned valuable lessons from that experience: Trust no one. Be loyal to no one but God. Chacun pour soi, Dieu pour tous! (Every man for himself, and God for us all.)